Mindy McCready's Boyfriend David Wilson Died of a Self-Inflicted Gunshot Wound















01/15/2013 at 11:30 AM EST



Last year, things were looking up for Mindy McCready after a judge awarded her custody of her 6-year-old son, Zander.

"It was good news," her rep, Kat Atwood, tells PEOPLE. "The custody battle was over. Zander was comfortable at home with Mindy. She had a new baby. Things were going well."

But everything fell apart for McCready on Sunday night, when her partner, David Wilson, shot himself.

"It was a self-inflicted gunshot wound," Atwood says. "Now they're working on funeral arrangements and figuring out where to go from here."

For the first 24 hours after the shooting, McCready, 37, was alone with her children. (She and Wilson had a 9-month-old son, Zayne.) "Her family drove up from Florida," says Atwood. "I'm not exactly sure when they got there, but her personal friends arrived late last night."

This marks the latest setback in the troubled life of McCready, who has struggled with custody battles, addiction and her own suicide attempts.

Those close to her hope that the love of family and friends will help her through this difficult ordeal. "She is surrounded by people who love her and are there for her," says Atwood. "It's a very sad time, but she has support in place."

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Experts: Proposed NY gun law might hinder therapy


NEW YORK (AP) — Mental health experts say a proposed New York state gun control law might interfere with treatment of potentially dangerous people and even discourage them from seeking help.


One provision would require therapists and doctors to tell government authorities if they believe a patient is likely to harm himself or others. That could lead to revoking a patient's gun permit and seizing the gun.


Dr. Paul Appelbaum, director of law, ethics and psychiatry at Columbia University, said that provision might discourage people from revealing thoughts of harm to a therapist, or even from seeking treatment at all.


Dr. Mark Olfson, a psychiatry professor at Columbia, said if the law is crudely applied, it could erode the trust patients have in their doctors which is needed for effective care.


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Wall Street knocked lower by debt limit worries, Apple

NEW YORK (Reuters) - U.S. stocks fell on Tuesday on worries over the debate brewing in Washington over raising the U.S. borrowing limit, while Apple's stock extended its fall on concerns of weaker demand for its products.


Economic data offset some of the negative tone after retail sales rose more than expected in December. But manufacturing activity in New York state contracted for the sixth month in a row in January.


On Monday, President Barack Obama rejected any negotiations with Republicans over raising the U.S. debt ceiling. The United States could default on its debt if Congress does not increase the borrowing limit.


Resolving the debt ceiling debate is more a question of how than if. Investors don't expect a U.S. default, but they are also wary of another eleventh-hour agreement like the one in August 2011.


"The concern is just the uncertainty and the negotiating going down to the last minute," said John Fox, co-manager of the FAM Value Fund, in Cobleskill, New York.


Apple fell for the third day in a row, weighing on the Nasdaq after reports on Monday of cuts to orders for iPhone parts. Apple was down more than 2 percent at $491.96. The stock fell below $500 for the first time in almost a year on Monday.


The Dow Jones industrial average <.dji> slipped 29.55 points, or 0.22 percent, to 13,477.77. The Standard & Poor's 500 Index <.spx> fell 4.35 points, or 0.30 percent, to 1,466.33. The Nasdaq Composite Index <.ixic> gave up 18.82 points, or 0.60 percent, at 3,098.68.


Although Tuesday's economic data was mostly positive, reaction in the market was likely to be limited since investors' attention centered on the negotiations over the debt ceiling and spending cuts, said Hugh Johnson, chief investment officer of Hugh Johnson Advisors LLC in Albany, NY.


"'Fiscal Cliff Two' is now the principal focus of investors," he said.


An expected lackluster earnings season also kept investors from taking aggressive bets. Analyst estimates for the quarter have fallen sharply since October. S&P 500 earnings growth is now seen up just 1.9 percent from a year ago, Thomson Reuters data showed.


Homebuilder Lennar reported a sharp rise in quarterly profit, but the stock fell 2.2 percent to $40.11 on worries that growth in orders was slowing.


Shares of Dell rose 3.1 percent to $12.67 the day after sources said the company is in talks with private equity firms on a potential buyout.


Facebook added 0.6 percent to $31.11 ahead of a major news event at its headquarters. The secretive nature of the event has triggered a guessing game about what the company could unveil.


(Editing by Kenneth Barry)



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IHT Rendezvous: 2012: The Year of Extreme Weather

The weather reports are in. 2012 was the hottest and the most extreme year on record in many places.

While parts of China are enduring the harshest winter in 30 years, the Antarctic is warming at an alarming rate. In Australia, out of control bushfires are partially the result of record-breaking weather (new colors were added to weather forecast maps, to account for the new kind of heat). In the United States, where Hurricane Sandy devastated parts of New Jersey and New York and where extreme drought still lingers in the Midwest, the average temperature in 2012 was more than a whole degree Fahrenheit (or 5/9 of a degree Celsius) higher than average – shattering the record.

On Friday a long-term weather forecast for the United States was released, when the National Climate Assessment and Development Advisory Committee published a draft of the third Climate Assessment Report. Like last year’s weather, the assessment does not pull its punches.

“Climate change threatens human health and well-being in many ways, including impacts from increased extreme weather events, wildfire, decreased air quality, diseases transmitted by insects, food, and water, and threats to mental health,” write the authors as part of their key findings.

Experts from 13 federal agencies, including NASA, the State Department and the Department of Defense put together the report under the auspices of the United States Global Change Research Program.

While some predictions have been adjusted upward from previous reports, the difference in tone in this newest assessment is striking. The second assessment, published in 2009, predicted of thresholds that will be crossed, while the 2013 draft presents a reality in which some of the changes are already irreversible.

“As a result of past emissions of heat-trapping gases, some amount of additional climate change and related impacts is now unavoidable,” wrote the authors in the executive summary.

Adaptation to climate change is discussed in the new draft, which is open for public comment before it is officially released early in 2014. The authors write:

Planning and managing based on the climate of the last century means that tolerances of some infrastructure and species will be exceeded. For example, building codes and landscaping ordinances will likely need to be updated not only for energy efficiency, but also to conserve water supplies, protect against insects that spread disease, reduce susceptibility to heat stress, and improve protection against extreme events.

The authors predict that within the next several decades, temperatures will go up between 2 and 4 degrees Fahrenheit, roughly 1 and 2 degrees Celsius. The experts discuss a possible 10 degree Fahrenheit (or more than 5 degrees Celsius) warming by the end of the century, in the case that not enough is done to curb emissions. (The World Bank recently released a report of the dangers of a world warmed by 4 degrees Celsius).

Sea levels could rise up to four feet, or 1.2 meters, within the century, according to the experts.

Though official assessments, predictions and studies like these serve to reinforce what many already fear, they do not necessarily lead to policy change. Andrew Restuccia predicted in a Politico article that the new report would ultimately do little to change the embittered climate-change politics in that country. He wrote:

But don’t hold your breath for serious action on climate change in Congress. Republicans and some moderate Democrats remain opposed to measures to address climate change. The Obama administration, meanwhile, is moving forward with its own efforts on climate change, including beefed-up fuel economy standards and greenhouse gas regulations for new power plants.

Sometimes official assessment reports provide substance for those who question man-made climate change.

My colleague Andrew C. Revkin recently reported on how a revision by Britain’s Weather and Climate Agency on short-term global temperature forecast became fodder for climate change deniers. The fact that the government agency had revised its numbers downward allowed climate change skeptics to argue that the world was not significantly warming after all.

In December, Alec Rawls, a climate-change skeptic, made a name for himself by leaking an unpublished Assessment Report from the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change, one of the major global players in climate change assessment. Mr. Rawls tried to argue that the panel’s language on solar radiation was an admission that much of the warming trends were caused by the sun, not human activity.

As Andrew reported at time, his claims were mostly debunked.

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RIM says 15,000 BlackBerry 10 apps submitted in under two days









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It'll Be a Girl for Nick & JoAnna Garcia Swisher




Celebrity Baby Blog





01/14/2013 at 11:45 AM ET



Golden Globes: Nick and JoAnna Garcia Swisher Having a Girl
Paul Marks/Broadimage


This spring will bring more than just May flowers for Nick and JoAnna Garcia Swisher — the couple will welcome a baby girl that month as well, they confirm to PEOPLE exclusively.


“I’m just so excited,” the outfielder and first baseman, 32, told PEOPLE at the InStyle/Warner Brothers Golden Globes after party on Sunday. “As long as she’s healthy, that’s all I really care about.”


As for the mommy-to-be, 33, the former Animal Practice star is just enjoying the “honeymoon stage” of her pregnancy after a “humbling” week of being “really into mayonnaise.”


“I tried to put it on everything but that faded,” Garcia Swisher, who was wearing Marina B. jewelry, explains. “Now I’m just trying to eat healthy and you know, the further I get in the pregnancy the more I need to eat!”

With Swisher — who recently wrapped a stint with the New York Yankees — accepting an offer to play for the Cleveland Indians, the expectant parents have been busy prepping three different nurseries for their bundle of joy.


“My husband works in one city, I work in a second city and we live in a third city, so we have a lot of cribs to buy,” the actress shares.


And though they’ve got several more months to go, the couple can’t wait to meet their daughter.


“It’s been a wonderful journey for us to be able to do this together,” says Swisher. “It’s going to be great. In a couple of months, our lives are going to turn upside-down.”


– Melody Chiu


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Flu more widespread in US; eases off in some areas


NEW YORK (AP) — Flu is now widespread in all but three states as the nation grapples with an earlier-than-normal season. But there was one bit of good news Friday: The number of hard-hit areas declined.


The flu season in the U.S. got under way a month early, in December, driven by a strain that tends to make people sicker. That led to worries that it might be a bad season, following one of the mildest flu seasons in recent memory.


The latest numbers do show that the flu surpassed an "epidemic" threshold last week. That is based on deaths from pneumonia and influenza in 122 U.S. cities. However, it's not unusual — the epidemic level varies at different times of the year, and it was breached earlier this flu season, in October and November.


And there's a hint that the flu season may already have peaked in some spots, like in the South. Still, officials there and elsewhere are bracing for more sickness


In Ohio, administrators at Miami University are anxious that a bug that hit employees will spread to students when they return to the Oxford campus next week.


"Everybody's been sick. It's miserable," said Ritter Hoy, a spokeswoman for the 17,000-student school.


Despite the early start, health officials say it's not too late to get a flu shot. The vaccine is considered a good — though not perfect — protection against getting really sick from the flu.


Flu was widespread in 47 states last week, up from 41 the week before, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention said on Friday. The only states without widespread flu were California, Mississippi and Hawaii.


The number of hard-hit states fell to 24 from 29, where larger numbers of people were treated for flu-like illness. Now off that list: Florida, Arkansas and South Carolina in the South, the first region hit this flu season.


Recent flu reports included holiday weeks when some doctor's offices were closed, so it will probably take a couple more weeks to get a better picture, CDC officials said Friday. Experts say so far say the season looks moderate.


"Only time will tell how moderate or severe this flu season will be," CDC Director Dr. Thomas Frieden said Friday in a teleconference with reporters.


The government doesn't keep a running tally of adult deaths from the flu, but estimates that it kills about 24,000 people in an average year. Nationally, 20 children have died from the flu this season.


Flu vaccinations are recommended for everyone 6 months or older. Since the swine flu epidemic in 2009, vaccination rates have increased in the U.S., but more than half of Americans haven't gotten this year's vaccine.


Nearly 130 million doses of flu vaccine were distributed this year, and at least 112 million have been used. Vaccine is still available, but supplies may have run low in some locations, officials said.


To find a shot, "you may have to call a couple places," said Dr. Patricia Quinlisk, who tracks the flu in Iowa.


In midtown Manhattan, Hyrmete Sciuto got a flu shot Friday at a drugstore. She skipped it in recent years, but news reports about the flu this week worried her.


During her commute from Edgewater, N.J., by ferry and bus, "I have people coughing in my face," she said. "I didn't want to risk it this year."


The vaccine is no guarantee, though, that you won't get sick. On Friday, CDC officials said a recent study of more than 1,100 people has concluded the current flu vaccine is 62 percent effective. That means the average vaccinated person is 62 percent less likely to get a case of flu that sends them to the doctor, compared to people who don't get the vaccine. That's in line with other years.


The vaccine is reformulated annually, and this year's is a good match to the viruses going around.


The flu's early arrival coincided with spikes in flu-like illnesses caused by other bugs, including a new norovirus that causes vomiting and diarrhea, or what is commonly known as "stomach flu." Those illnesses likely are part of the heavy traffic in hospital and clinic waiting rooms, CDC officials said.


Europeans also are suffering an early flu season, though a milder strain predominates there. China, Japan, the West Bank, the Gaza Strip, Algeria and the Republic of Congo have also reported increasing flu.


Flu usually peaks in midwinter. Symptoms can include fever, cough, runny nose, head and body aches and fatigue. Some people also suffer vomiting and diarrhea, and some develop pneumonia or other severe complications.


Most people with flu have a mild illness. But people with severe symptoms should see a doctor. They may be given antiviral drugs or other medications to ease symptoms.


Some shortages have been reported for children's liquid Tamiflu, a prescription medicine used to treat flu. But health officials say adult Tamiflu pills are available, and pharmacists can convert those to doses for children.


___


Associated Press writers Dan Sewell in Cincinnati, Catherine Lucey in Des Moines, and Malcolm Ritter in New York contributed to this report.


___


Online:


CDC flu: http://www.cdc.gov/flu/index.htm


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S&P, Nasdaq dip as Apple weighs

NEW YORK (Reuters) - Wall Street slipped on Monday, weighed down by shares of Apple in the face of demand concerns, while investors faced a busy week for earnings in what is expected to be a lackluster quarter.


Apple lost 2.8 percent to $505.84 as the biggest drag on both the S&P 500 and Nasdaq 100 <.ndx> indexes after reports that the tech company has cut orders for LCD screens and other parts for the iPhone 5 this quarter due to weak demand. The stock earlier hit a session low of $498.51, the first dip below $500 since February 16.


"There is this speculation building 'Is this the end of Apple?'" said Carol Pepper, chief executive of Pepper International in New York.


But Pepper said Apple also "doesn't have to grow at the rate it was to do extremely well. It's still going to be one of the marquee companies of the U.S. and the world."


Apple suppliers also lost ground, with Cirrus Logic off 6.8 percent to $29.43 and Qualcomm down 1.2 percent to $64.13. The S&P tech sector <.gspt> gave up 0.9 percent as the worst perfumer of the 10 major S&P sectors.


The pace of earnings season picks up this week with 38 S&P 500 companies set to report, including Goldman Sachs , Bank of America , Intel and General Electric .


Overall earnings are expected to grow by just 1.9 percent in this reporting period, according to Thomson Reuters data.


President Barack Obama is expected to hold a news conference, which will cover looming budget and debt ceiling due dates on Monday, White House officials said.


"We could have some more noise because they are trying to get people to focus on their issues, but I don't think they are going" to allow the government to default, said Pepper.


Separately, Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke will be speaking on monetary policy, recovery from the global financial crisis and long-term challenges facing the American economy at 4 p.m. (2100 GMT).


The Dow Jones industrial average <.dji> added 6.79 points, or 0.05 percent, to 13,495.22. The Standard & Poor's 500 Index <.spx> shed 3.37 points, or 0.23 percent, to 1,468.68. The Nasdaq Composite Index <.ixic> lost 14.16 points, or 0.45 percent, to 3,111.48.


Appliance and electronics retailer Hhgregg Inc slumped 9.6 percent to $7.13 after the electronics and appliance retailer cut its same-store sales forecast for the full year.


Transocean Ltd has disclosed that billionaire activist investor Carl Icahn has acquired a 1.56 percent stake in the offshore rig contractor and is looking to increase that holding. Its shares rose 2.5 percent to $55.43.


The Dow, which does not list Apple as one of its components, fared better than the other two indexes as Hewlett-Packard rose 3.8 percent to $16.78 after JPMorgan upgraded its rating on the stock and raised its price target to $21 from $15.


(Reporting by Chuck Mikolajczak; Editing by Kenneth Barry)



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Thousands of Russians Rally Against Adoption Ban





MOSCOW – Thousands of Russians marched on Sunday in condemnation of the Russian Parliament’s move to ban adoption of Russian children by American families, an event dubbed a “March Against Scoundrels,” where participants chanted, “Take your hands off children,” and carried posters showing the faces of lawmakers stamped with the word “Shame.”




Marchers flooded tree-lined boulevards for many blocks on a bitterly cold day. The police estimated the turnout for the march, which was sanctioned by city authorities, at 9,500; a group of activists who made a count told Interfax that there were about 24,000 participants.


The sight gags and clever slogans of last year’s anti-government rallies were gone Sunday, and many participants had emotional answers for why they came to march. Many questioned the moral principles of a ban on adoptions by Americans in a country with so many children in foster care or orphanages.


“Even I can’t afford to adopt, and I’m supposedly middle class,” Yekaterina Komissarova, 31, said, adding that perhaps the issue angered her so deeply because she was the mother of two children.


Another marcher, Tamara Nikolayeva, 62, raised her voice to a near-shout as she accused Russian leaders of using orphans as pawns.


“They have decided to settle a score by using children, and it’s shameful,” Ms. Nikolayeva said, as her friends gathered around, nodding their encouragement. “O.K., maybe at some point, it will be better not to give our children away; we should take care of them ourselves. But first you have to make life better for them here. Give them a chance to study. Give them a chance to get medical treatment.”


The adoption ban has underlined a growing division in Russian society, as the government has embraced conservative rhetoric tailored to voters in the heartland, and turned away from prosperous city-dwellers who have mobilized over the Internet. State-controlled television has regaled Russians with reports of American parents who abuse or neglect Russian children, and a top official derided the marchers as “child-sellers.”


“I am especially surprised to see people gather at such a large action in support of American business — because for them, our children, Russian children, are factually, let’s put it this way, an object of trade,” said Yekaterina Lakhova, the United Russia lawmaker who sponsored the ban, in an interview with Kommersant FM radio station shortly after Sunday’s march began.


“Economically developed countries – and we do not consider ourselves a third-world country, we are in the top 20 – do not give up their children to foreign adoption as much as we do,” she said. “Excuse me, but in the past years, we have given the United States a small city with a population of up to 100,000, that is how many children we have given up to foreign adoptions.”


President Vladimir V. Putin approved the adoption ban in late December, as part of a broader law retaliating against the United States for the so-called Magnitsky Act, an effort to punish Russian officials accused of human rights violations.


Russian leaders have complained bitterly for years about light sentences handed down in cases where American adoptive parents abused or neglected children adopted from Russia, and named the ban after Dmitri Yakovlev, a toddler who died of heatstroke in Virginia in 2008 after his adoptive father left him in a parked car for nine hours.


But the decision has proven divisive in Russia, even within government circles. More than 650,000 children live in foster care or orphanages in Russia, of whom about 120,000 are eligible for adoption. Many children in orphanages are sick or disabled, and most have little hope of finding permanent homes.


“We hope that these people, who came out to express their opinion, are aware of the plans of our nation’s leaders to bring order to the adoption process, and the implementation of a range of measures aimed to improve the lives of orphans,” Dmitri S. Peskov, the Kremlin press secretary, said.


The protesters on Sunday, however, were not likely to be convinced. One woman carried a sign that read, “Stop the repressions, you’re making revolutionaries out of us.” Many said they support the Magnitsky Act, which was passed by the American Congress late last year, as a way to hold Russian officials accountable for crimes that would otherwise never be punished.


“I truly think they have lost touch with society, and they use these laws to divert society’s anger toward ‘our enemies,’ the Americans,” said Boris Komberg, a physicist who was distributing a poem he had written about the adoption issue.


Yelena Rostova, 61, said anger over the ban had crystallized in the two weeks that followed its passage and caught the authorities by surprised.


“They expected that, as usual, we would swallow it, keep quiet,” Ms. Rostova said. “We have had two weeks to think about this law, and not everyone understood right away, but as time passed, people realized what it means to leave invalids, sick children, in Russia, where there is no help. Everyone knows what kind of medicine we have here.”


Because of the long winter holidays, there is little fresh public opinion data, but a survey released in December by the Public Opinion Foundation showed that 56 percent of Russians approved of banning adoptions by Americans.


Leonid Perlov, 58, a geography professor, cast an appraising eye back at the long line of marchers that filled the boulevard behind him. He then turned back, and said it would be foolish to expect political change any time soon.


“This is not the country,” he said. “This is Moscow. Believe me, there is a very big difference.”


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Why This Outdated Dating Manual Did Not Need a Social-Media Update






The Rules, a dating instruction manual of yore by two ladies named Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider (they know what they’re talking about ’cause they’re married!), should, by now, have gone the way of the cave drawing or the horse and buggy, as a relic of times past. It was initially published in 1995, nearly 20 years ago, and we don’t even want to calculate what that means in dog years. But alas, it’s still hanging around, lurking in the bookshelves of various bricks and mortar stores where such things are sold; lingering on Amazon.com and giving us coquettish looks; promising such things as actual, official answers in the ongoing struggle to win a man and make him put a ring on it (I’m paraphrasing, of course).


RELATED: Actual Wall Streeters Respond to Matchmaker’s Tips for Dating Them






Far from aging gracefully and going away, it’s been updated to bring it up to speed with the newfangled ways in which we do things, you know, on the Facebook and World Wide Web and whatnot. Of course, business-wise, this makes sense. It’s a best-seller! In fact, there’s a whole franchise of Rules books, described by Elle as “one of the best self-help books of all time.” So why wouldn’t Fein and Schneider and their publisher hope to make some more money with a new installment of the book that promises answers to pressing social media-dating questions like these: “How long should I wait to respond to his text message? Can I friend him on Facebook? Why did he ask for my number but never call me?” 


RELATED: Andrea Peyser Does Not Approve of This ‘Online Dating’


Well, they would. Grand Central Publishing released the book, Not Your Mother’s Rules, on January 8, and it’s ranked number 4 in dating books on Amazon. One would presume from the title and the pitch that the ladies behind it hope that the younger generations will lap this stuff up, just like their moms did. 


RELATED: Commuting to the Suburbs of Love


Of course, it’s a self-help book, so I am predisposed to dislike it. Self-help books, especially those about dating, often fall into a category that could be better described as, well, undermining. The problems with such books for me are multifold. One, they posit that human relationships can be commoditized; that there is one path that works for all in terms of getting what you want. (They also presume, in a stereotypical manner, that what we all want is the same, and, I think, infer there’s some ongoing battle between men, who want one thing, and women, who want the opposite.) I don’t think those messages are true, and I don’t think they’re particularly healthy or helpful, either.


RELATED: The Trials of Being a Married Olympian


Further, self-help books are published to make money. Those that say they’ll teach a reader how to get married or get the relationship they want do so by preying on the bewilderment, confusion, insecurity, and desires of women (and sometimes men, too). Sure, dating is hard. Sure, it’s difficult to find “the right person.” But the process should also to be fun, experiential, silly, weird, unique, and something we learn from. Figuring out what you want for yourself by doing it, that’s a great thing. Making dating about adhering to some code that a couple of people came up with and want to sell you so they can make money, well, that’s not so great. Women and men may read this stuff because they think it can’t hurt. Sometimes it feels good to believe that there are rules that can be followed to get what we want; it means we need only have the dedication and commitment to follow those rules, which is way easier than, for instance, thinking for ourselves deeply and making our own decisions, and having courage and believing in ourselves. 


RELATED: Old People Are Getting Better at Dating


Some of the advice in this book may not be categorically awful. Simplified to “don’t act like an obsessive”; “pause before you rush to do something you regret”; and “take care of yourself!” some instructions could actually be quite handy as a common-sense reminder. But categorizing it as stuff women need to follow to snag a man makes it highly problematic, even if the occasional tip is not so bad. And stuff like this, “New chapters include rules for text flirting: women under 30 wait 30 minutes to respond to a man’s text; older women should wait 4 hours,” as Pat Kiernan wrote today on his blog, is particularly disheartening, and inherently sort of woman-hating. Control your texting, The Rules ladies say. “Women shouldn’t take the first step to initiate any relationship — and that includes online dating,” they told the New York Daily News. Once you have a guy, ignore him, “at least for a little while.” And don’t sext until you’re married. That might save us from a few political scandals. But is this the kind of advice women need, in this day and age? 


If there was to be an excellent dating self-help book for the year 2013, I’d hope it would tell people to trust themselves. To behave as they see fit, according to the situation they’re in, regardless of age, because they are smart, lovely people who deserve the good things they put out into the world, and even if they make mistakes, they’ll find their way and do the right thing. That self-help book would tell women to stop reading dating self-help books, and instead to behave as though they knew they were wise enough to decide for themselves what they should do, to interpret the signs and make the right moves, or make the wrong ones and deal with that, too, instead of adhering to some rules that aren’t really the way we are at all. It would most of all tell everyone to be themselves, and stop pretending to be something else. Because The Rules, and those who follow them, create some weird perceptions among men and women. Suddenly anyone who does text someone right back is perceived somehow as needy or “too easy to get.” That’s especially odd given that a four-hour delay in a response, when you could respond quite easily, is actually rather rude. Would that we could rid the world of such descriptions as “hard to get” altogether, because more important than playing games or appearing a certain way (difficult to get?) is finding someone you care about and behaving a way that shows that you do. Why do we persist, instead, in making everything so convoluted and difficult?


We can only hope, I suppose, that as time progresses these tips will become as ancient and quaint-sounding as, for example, the instructions in Miss Leslie’s Behavior Book, published in the 1800s. Until then, a word of advice. Follow your instincts; if it feels right, it probably is; don’t believe everything you read in dating books, and maybe, do yourself a favor: Don’t read dating advice books at all. But DO read Miss Leslie’s, for snippets such as this: 


b40b1  8527d59c0385dddd0caa8a3261fe7dde 510x283 Why This Outdated Dating Manual Did Not Need a Social Media Update


Now, that’s helpful advice. 


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